help.

sometimes, if you keep your eyes & ears open, you learn a lot. so i've neglected my epic writing mission to discuss love & all that nonsense. whoops! i'll get to it, soon. lately, i've been thinking about. numbers have a way of doing damage. mathematics is my enemy, & time doesn't help. in a few days, my car will reach it's 4 year mark with me. many, many miles & lots & lots of repairs. of course, that makes me think back to how things were at the time & how things have changed. the people that have come & gone & the people that have stayed. everything i had & everything i have & want now. so much has changed. i learned to distance myself from my former self & grow in new directions. do i feel i've made progress? sometimes yes, sometimes no. do i seek the same things then as now? not quite. i have a vision of an ideal life, of things i would like to have, that would make me feel good about the way the chips have fallen. but as you look around & listen closely, you start to realize why things can often be so difficult. how do you adjust? no clue. for the meantime, i'll continue to keep honesty alive. someone has to.